This will be a small archive of other posts on other blogs.
Welcome to my World.
Bring a Helmet.
* Initial Blog Entry about My Bell's Palsy *
I want you to go to the mirror and look at your face.....then smile. I'll wait.
What did you see? A smile?
It
is amazing to me how much I took for granted the simple act of smiling.
The ability to eat and drink with my whole mouth. To taste a new recipe
I just made or to talk on the phone with my family. I will never take
these things for granted again.
A week ago I started
to feel a intermittent 'smoothness' or numbness to part of my tongue. I
did think much about it. I'm a bit of a hypochondriac. The following day
I sitting on the porch, talking with my mom and I realized that it was
becoming increasingly difficult to drink my coffee and control my lips
as I talked. Alarming. As the day progress so did the strange change in
my facial abilities.
By the following morning the
right side of my face had become completely useless and I had no control
over it. Awesome. I'm dying. It has to be a stroke. Panic ensues.
Parker rushes me to an emergency clinic.
After a brief
check over by the doctor, he leans back on the wall and looks at me
says, " Do you want to know what you have?" I stare at him blankly
-(partly because I can't move half my face & partly because I
thought if I don't I will leap across the room and beat him for asking
such a STUPID FUCKING question) OF COURSE I WANT TO KNOW YOU ASS. He
looks at me and tells me I have Bell's Palsy.
Bell's
Palsy - discovered by Sir Scot Bells - It is an inflammation of one of
the major cranial nerves that controls muscle movement in your face. The
increased inflammation causes partial facial paralysis. Causes are
infections, head trauma, autoimmune diseases, Lyme's Disease, Herpes
virus. Recovery can be anywhere from days to weeks, to years.
Cue the tears.
I
have had no infections, no trauma, no medical lead up to this. My
doctor has referred me to a neurologist. I'm taking enough steroids to
make Major League Baseball players look like pussies. And an antiviral
medication five times a day.
Cue laughter.
I have been trying to take it easy and re-learn how to do the most simple daily activities. Here's what I have learned.
*
Straws have always been my favorite thing to use - now they are
essential. I am the girl that steals extra ones from the fast food place
so I always have extras in my purse. Don't judge - they are pre-wrapped
and Walmart hasn't figured out how to market those bad boys yet.
*
Soap is the enemy. My right eye doesn't shut all the way. Imagine
washing with SOAP and not being able to close your eye. Wash cloths are
AWESOME!!! Burning in the eye is not.
* Eating is a challenge. And not fun to watch. At least I might lose some weight!!! * insert wonky smile here*
*
Talking is an effort. But as any good girl will tell you......you make
do. Phone calls are an essential part of my day. I will NOT give in.
Just bear with me.
* I already have my Halloween costume picked out. Two face from Batman. You gotta have fun with it, right?
* My family and friends are amazing. It's gonna be O.K.
*
Parker has been amazing. He has held my hand and told me it's gonna be
O.K. - He smiles at me and giggles when I try and smile back - which
makes me giggle more. He reminds me that no matter how frustrated I
get.....this too shall pass. I love you.
* I'm NOT
going to let this get to me. All the horror stories. All the
possibilities of problems and side effects are NOT going to slow me down
or worry me into mental breakdown. I'm gonna be OK. I'm a Martinez. We
GOT this!!
I'm going to keep smiling my wonky smile. I'm going to keep upbeat and make fun of my new face. Humor is the best medicine.
And
when that cashier at Target or the food store look at me, and ask me in
an overly friendly *oh you poor mentally retarded girl* voice, " Do you
need help to your car", or my favorite - when they talk extra loud and
slow so I can understand - I will smile my wonky smile and say " I'm
sick NOT stupid". Or what the hell....I'm simply play it up and accept
the help. Why not, right??? Hahahaha.
I'm still me. And I'm still awesome. It's going to take more than a wonky face to bring this bitch down. WHA-CHA!!!!
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