Bell's Palsy 1 - Me 0

I'm at the the 3 week stage with Bell's Palsy.

Bell's Palsy 1 ~ Me - 0

Not sure how I feel about this whole thing. It has been 3 weeks & it is difficult to say whether I see any real improvement. But I wouldn't, would I? Or should I?

Yep. Welcome to my World. A world where no one can actually say how long this will last; whether I should see improve or not; how this came about; what to expect. It's a world filled with questions but no one has the answers. My doctor stares blankly at me when I ask if this is normal? If I can do anything to help the recovery? Hello? Are you even listening???

Yes. The she is listening. And has no idea what is happening or why. Helpful!!??!?!?!

She tells me it is too early to expect change. Um, yeah. She tells me we need to wait and see. Really?! She tells me that Bell's Palsy is a strange, misunderstood condition that remains so because in the larger scheme of things...."it doesn't kill people, or leave them permanently disabled; so there isn't the research or time put into understanding it" Well that's comforting.

I get it. I understand that there are more serious conditions out there. I have family and friends that have dealt with life-changing, life -threatening illnesses & cancers. I am forever grateful to the medical community and research foundations that have discovered new treatments that have saved them. But the selfish part of me says.....'Wait a minute! I have a medical condition too! And NO ONE has any real idea why or how or what it is" I can't help but be a little frustrated and quite honestly, a little scared.

What's to say this won't get better. And if it does, will I get it again? Because at this point no one knows how I got it in the first place!!

And around in circles we go.......

Yesterday I went to Parker's Softball game - as many of you know, he is in the military, so the softball game was a squadron to squadron friendly - and it was a strange experience.

Everyone knows me. Well, most people Parker works with know me. And at this point they know about my BP. It was all friendly smiles; well wishes; words of support and most importantly, not asking at all.....treating like they would in any other situation. Awesome. What an awesome military family.
However, I did learn a few things....some good....some not so good.

• Some people (I feel it important to say they were strangers, not part of the sq.) were not so understanding. Watching me talk and mimicking what, or HOW I was talking was NOT OK. I was immediately defensive and felt the need to leave. I didn't of course. Screw them. 
• No pity. I don't want your pity. And thank you to all who wished me well....but showed no pity. It's hard enough to be social sometimes, without the looks of pity. I pity the fool who tries it. 
• I can't participate as I wish I could. I'm not a great softball player.....but I do love to try. It was frustrating to realize that at this moment I can't. High impact exercise just aggravates the muscles in my face & leaves me with a painful wonky smile. Grrrr. 
• I can't drink from a water fountain. Or a sports bottle. Forgot my straws. 

Yesterday I was feeling a little disappointed and mildly frustrated.

Yesterday it was Bell's Palsy One .....Me - Nada.

Today I intend on winning one for the team.

Today it will be BP - One ..... Me - One.